There room some females who can be girlfriend with guys who’ve rejected them, however I’m not one of them. I don’t think there’s anything wrong through it, the course; it’s just not conducive to mine happiness. If I choose a guy and he only sees me as a friend, sorry, yet this is why I’d rather just cut off contact completely:

I can’t revolve off my feelings. 

Writer Sylvia Plath when said, “I like people too lot or no at all,” and I’m inclined to agree. If i really choose a guy romantically, ns can’t rotate off those feelings in a hurry. Continuing to be friends through him is only going to carry me pain.

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Friendship feels choose a consolation prize. 

I know friendship is valuable, but in the paper definition of unrequited love, it feels favor winning a luggage set instead that the main prize, which was the expedition to Hawaii.

It’s tough to ruin hope.

 If I’m going to be roughly a male after that rejected me romantically, hope is walk to it is in a killer. I’m going to store crossing mine fingers the he’ll adjust his mind about me, only to obtain disappointed again and also again. I can’t address all the drama.

I understand what i want and also won’t settle for less. 

Ejecting a man from my life since he’s no interested in dating me sounds prefer I’m one egomaniac. But it’s yes, really not around that. I simply know what I desire in life, and I’m no the form to clear up for less. Friendship feels like a downgrade, and also as good as it might be, it’s no what ns wanted, for this reason why need to I pressure it come happen?

It’s self-preservation, not selfishness. 

The man who dissed me to be looking the end for himself. He made the choice not come be through me, and hey, that’s his right. Yet I have rights, too. I have to look after myself and focus top top what’s good and healthy for me. I can’t continue to be in a friendship if I’m no going to it is in happy; mine needs require to issue more.

I’m not fake. 

I’m upfront around who i am, and I don’t have actually time to pretend to be someone else. I’m no going to satisfy the male for lunch while inwardly seething due to the fact that my attraction to him is practically killing me. I’d quite walk away from the instance than have to grin and also bear future discomfort. Why placed myself in those situations?

I have enough friends. 

I have loads of girlfriend in mine life. I really don’t require a guy who has actually rejected me romantically to end up being one of them. It just feels warped, prefer trying to ignite a friendship v an ex after ~ the awkwardness of a breakup. Some civilization are just not expected to it is in friends, and also that’s okay.

I won’t remain stuck in my life. It’s easy to gain wrapped increase in a guy I’m romantically interested in. If that male is currently my friend, crap’s going to walk down. I’m walk to it is in holding off on meeting various other guys due to the fact that this one’s going to come to be a priority. I’m going to waste a many time examining things he’s done or said, combing through every little thing to check if he’s do a move. Ns don’t have time because that that. I desire to move onto bigger, much better things.

I don’t recycle issues. 

There space bound come be issues if I continue to be friends through a guy I’m into who’s rejected me. These difficulties are going to chop up into our friendship in some form or form, which means I’m walk to have actually to deal with them since I captured a nasty situation of romantic feelings. Ugh. Ns don’t desire to be grounding in a fat heap of emotional baggage, i m sorry is the same factor why ns can’t it is in friends through my exes. I want to lining it out and move on.

Why need to I it is in the one to compromise and also change? 

After being rejected, I’m the one who will have to work more tough to do a friendship work. I have to push my feelings aside, try to get over the guy, and also so on. But hell. Why have to a friendship it is in so hard? It’s simply not precious it.

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I’ve learned indigenous the past and also don’t desire to walk back. 

The reason why i feel therefore strongly around not gift friends through someone I’m interested in is due to the fact that I’ve been there. I know exactly how crappy the feels to want to be with someone who only sees me together a friend. I know exactly how crappy the is to watch them all the time and try to embrace a friendship, but secretly be dying inside. I’m having none of that now. Gaining rejected was the end of mine control, but suffering isn’t. I don’t think anyone’s friendship is good enough for me if I’m walk to be going with hell to make it occur or if I’m walk to it is in sad many of the time. I have actually nothing to prove. Ns don’t need to be the nice girl that agreed to be friends. I simply want to be happy, and also I will be by go away.

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Jessica Blake Jessica Blake is a writer who loves an excellent books and good men, and realizes how complicated it is to discover both.